Dear all JAAG readers,
Well, this is it! I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Thank you to all of you for being such faithful readers, you make me all feel so happy and thank you all for letting me into your worlds and helping you out! May you and yours have a wonderful Christmas and enjoy time together!
Love,
rachelrae xx
Smile!
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
three non-relationship related questions ! :D
hello fellow readers!
well, the Christmas season is drawing near, and we are only a couple days away from the big day!
When I opened my inbox the other day, I was surprised to find three questions that weren't related to relationships, surprisingly enough! LOL you guys are so cute :) Let's tackle them, shall we?
Q: My parents just got a divorce, and they are forcing me and my sister to choose sides. What should I do? I love them both equally, but I can't live like this! - via Email
JAAG: This is a sad situation, I must say, but not to worry. I think it will be beneficial for you and your sister to sit BOTH of your parents down and tell them that you love them both equally. Maybe make a compromise: you and your sister will stay over with each parent once every other week, (mom the first week of the month, the following week at dad's, and so on and so forth). See how this works out first, and hopefully this will make everything easier and less stressful.
Q: I want to apply for a job, but my parents both think that I am not responsible enough. I'm 16! What more do they need? - via Email
JAAG: Oh, the constant struggle of showing our parents how responsible we are. What you can start by doing is taking on extra chores (yes, extra chores), doing what you are told, and helping out your parents doing whatever they need help with. Maybe this will open their eyes to show them that 'Yes, I'm ready to take on more!' Also, keep on top of homework and maybe try to go for more leadership roles in school. That way, not only your parents but other people will see that you are ready for bigger things too!
Q: Recently I've been feeling really sad all the time. Is this normal? - via Twitter
JAAG: No, it's completely normal. Everyone has down days sometimes, some people more than others. Heck, even the girl giving you all advice has down days. I must admit though, I can relate to you. I think that you can combat this by surrounding yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself as opposed to people that bring you down. Distract yourself by doing things you love, and remember, never hold back your emotions. Talking to someone you trust will make you feel better, I promise you. Best of luck to you with this!
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And of course, I couldn't resist answering at least one more relationship question for you all!..
Q: Hi JAAG! I have a big problem: I dated this guy for about 6 months and then he broke up with me. Then, a month after, I jumped into a new relationship with this other guy that I didn't know very well. I had no idea that my new boyfriend is total enemies with my ex! Now my ex is jealous and is trying to win me back. This is a huge love triangle that I want out of STAT. What should I do? - via Email
JAAG: Ahh, the Love Triangle.. this is a tricky one. Well, you can learn a couple things from this scenario called your life:
- your ex? he's a jerk. Thank goodness you broke up with him in the first place. If he is super jealous of you after he broke up with you? IMMATURE. you're too good for him.
- This just goes to show that it helps to get to know someone first before you begin to date someone.
- If your boyfriend now doesn't bash your ex, then we know that he is mature. If he does bash your ex, then we know that he is also mature.
So, I think that to salvage this situation, ignore your ex. Continue to have the relationship you wanted with your new boyfriend. If, however, your new boyfriend is trying to make this an all out competition with your ex, then honey, I'm terribly sorry, but you can't let either of them win. They have to both lose out, because someone as special as you shouldn't have to deal with crappy boyfriends like these. Also, get to know guys first before you date them! Good luck! :)
so yeah, these are quite the interesting questions. I have to say though, I won't be here for a while to answer your questions, but don't fret, I will be back soon in early January! Continue to send in your questions, and I will answer them ASAP. Best of luck to all of you in your unique and interesting lives, and also, have a MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!
STAY OUT OF TROUBLE AND DON'T FORGET TO SMILE! Here's to a new year of amazingness and being unique and ourselves!
love and et cetera,
rachelrae xx
well, the Christmas season is drawing near, and we are only a couple days away from the big day!
When I opened my inbox the other day, I was surprised to find three questions that weren't related to relationships, surprisingly enough! LOL you guys are so cute :) Let's tackle them, shall we?
Q: My parents just got a divorce, and they are forcing me and my sister to choose sides. What should I do? I love them both equally, but I can't live like this! - via Email
JAAG: This is a sad situation, I must say, but not to worry. I think it will be beneficial for you and your sister to sit BOTH of your parents down and tell them that you love them both equally. Maybe make a compromise: you and your sister will stay over with each parent once every other week, (mom the first week of the month, the following week at dad's, and so on and so forth). See how this works out first, and hopefully this will make everything easier and less stressful.
Q: I want to apply for a job, but my parents both think that I am not responsible enough. I'm 16! What more do they need? - via Email
JAAG: Oh, the constant struggle of showing our parents how responsible we are. What you can start by doing is taking on extra chores (yes, extra chores), doing what you are told, and helping out your parents doing whatever they need help with. Maybe this will open their eyes to show them that 'Yes, I'm ready to take on more!' Also, keep on top of homework and maybe try to go for more leadership roles in school. That way, not only your parents but other people will see that you are ready for bigger things too!
Q: Recently I've been feeling really sad all the time. Is this normal? - via Twitter
JAAG: No, it's completely normal. Everyone has down days sometimes, some people more than others. Heck, even the girl giving you all advice has down days. I must admit though, I can relate to you. I think that you can combat this by surrounding yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself as opposed to people that bring you down. Distract yourself by doing things you love, and remember, never hold back your emotions. Talking to someone you trust will make you feel better, I promise you. Best of luck to you with this!
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And of course, I couldn't resist answering at least one more relationship question for you all!..
Q: Hi JAAG! I have a big problem: I dated this guy for about 6 months and then he broke up with me. Then, a month after, I jumped into a new relationship with this other guy that I didn't know very well. I had no idea that my new boyfriend is total enemies with my ex! Now my ex is jealous and is trying to win me back. This is a huge love triangle that I want out of STAT. What should I do? - via Email
JAAG: Ahh, the Love Triangle.. this is a tricky one. Well, you can learn a couple things from this scenario called your life:
- your ex? he's a jerk. Thank goodness you broke up with him in the first place. If he is super jealous of you after he broke up with you? IMMATURE. you're too good for him.
- This just goes to show that it helps to get to know someone first before you begin to date someone.
- If your boyfriend now doesn't bash your ex, then we know that he is mature. If he does bash your ex, then we know that he is also mature.
So, I think that to salvage this situation, ignore your ex. Continue to have the relationship you wanted with your new boyfriend. If, however, your new boyfriend is trying to make this an all out competition with your ex, then honey, I'm terribly sorry, but you can't let either of them win. They have to both lose out, because someone as special as you shouldn't have to deal with crappy boyfriends like these. Also, get to know guys first before you date them! Good luck! :)
so yeah, these are quite the interesting questions. I have to say though, I won't be here for a while to answer your questions, but don't fret, I will be back soon in early January! Continue to send in your questions, and I will answer them ASAP. Best of luck to all of you in your unique and interesting lives, and also, have a MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!
STAY OUT OF TROUBLE AND DON'T FORGET TO SMILE! Here's to a new year of amazingness and being unique and ourselves!
love and et cetera,
rachelrae xx
Thursday, December 15, 2011
You've all given me a ton to think about!
The end of the school year ended today :) quite exciting, it's already Christmas!
Also, even though I answered 5 more questions my last post, ever since then my email was flooded with even more questions! you people have very interesting lives, I must say. Also, it is interesting to read some of these: now you guys are moving on from strictly relationship to more complex things. Is this a full blown advice column or what? Let me know, and I can make changes accordingly in the new year :)
Here we go, let's tackle five more of these questions!
Q: There are two guys that I like. One I have known for pretty much ever but he doesn't seem to get the point that friendship means that we are there for each other. The other guy is a new guy at my school: I just met him but he strikes me as a really nice guy. plus, when I talk to him I feel as if I have known him forever. I'm in love with both of them... but who should I go for? - via Email
JAAG: This is a situation that hits home, not just because I have dealt with feelings like that before as well but also because I know friends who feel the same way you do, so don't worry, it's not an uncommon feeling. I guess you should stay true to yourself and what you believe that you want to see in a boyfriend in your future. You should stay away from people who don't keep their promises or can't help you back onto your feet when you are down. Look for people who believe in you and respect you for who YOU are. If you do, then you will find that you are much, much happier.
Q: There is this guy that I don't like AT ALL, but he makes fun of me all the time. He is constantly bullying me and I have no idea what to do about it. I am really really mad at him. -via Email
JAAG: Hey, I've dealt with jerks like that too, so I can definitely help you with this.
Firstly, don't contain your anger. Talk it out with people that you trust. Vent to them about how you feel. Then, I would suggest for you to go and talk to this guy. He needs to be put in his place, and you can do that by telling him how you feel and how he offends you. If you tell him and he shows no remorse and (worse) continues to bully you, go tell a trusted adult or administration. Bullying doesn't belong in any area and should never be directed to anyone. Make sure that you don't hold in your anger to yourself too long, or else you might face an emotional break down. With a strong suppport system, you will be able to weather this storm fine. Good luck!
Q: How can I ask a guy out? -via Twitter
JAAG: Unlike the above two questions, I have no expertise in this field because no one has ever asked me out nor have I ever asked anyone out. What I can offer, however, is to just be yourself and friendly. If you really like a guy and you want them to fall for the real you, be genuine. Don't be the girl that laughs at random football jokes that you don't understand just because he is the quarterback of the team. Show him that you are good at bio and that you love dissecting frogs, and don't settle for anything less!
As for asking him out, start it off as a group activity. Maybe you and a couple friends are going to watch that new action flick coming out. Casually mention it to him and leave it open, giving him a chance to back out or think about it before commiting. After a couple of these activities, it will really show if he is the one for you... and if you still like him that way.
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well, like I said above, Christmas is coming so so so so so soon! I can't wait, can you??
STAY OUT OF TROUBLE AND DON;T FORGET TO SMILE! Merry Christmas and have a safe and happy New Year!
love,
rachelrae xx
Also, even though I answered 5 more questions my last post, ever since then my email was flooded with even more questions! you people have very interesting lives, I must say. Also, it is interesting to read some of these: now you guys are moving on from strictly relationship to more complex things. Is this a full blown advice column or what? Let me know, and I can make changes accordingly in the new year :)
Here we go, let's tackle five more of these questions!
Q: There are two guys that I like. One I have known for pretty much ever but he doesn't seem to get the point that friendship means that we are there for each other. The other guy is a new guy at my school: I just met him but he strikes me as a really nice guy. plus, when I talk to him I feel as if I have known him forever. I'm in love with both of them... but who should I go for? - via Email
JAAG: This is a situation that hits home, not just because I have dealt with feelings like that before as well but also because I know friends who feel the same way you do, so don't worry, it's not an uncommon feeling. I guess you should stay true to yourself and what you believe that you want to see in a boyfriend in your future. You should stay away from people who don't keep their promises or can't help you back onto your feet when you are down. Look for people who believe in you and respect you for who YOU are. If you do, then you will find that you are much, much happier.
Q: There is this guy that I don't like AT ALL, but he makes fun of me all the time. He is constantly bullying me and I have no idea what to do about it. I am really really mad at him. -via Email
JAAG: Hey, I've dealt with jerks like that too, so I can definitely help you with this.
Firstly, don't contain your anger. Talk it out with people that you trust. Vent to them about how you feel. Then, I would suggest for you to go and talk to this guy. He needs to be put in his place, and you can do that by telling him how you feel and how he offends you. If you tell him and he shows no remorse and (worse) continues to bully you, go tell a trusted adult or administration. Bullying doesn't belong in any area and should never be directed to anyone. Make sure that you don't hold in your anger to yourself too long, or else you might face an emotional break down. With a strong suppport system, you will be able to weather this storm fine. Good luck!
Q: How can I ask a guy out? -via Twitter
JAAG: Unlike the above two questions, I have no expertise in this field because no one has ever asked me out nor have I ever asked anyone out. What I can offer, however, is to just be yourself and friendly. If you really like a guy and you want them to fall for the real you, be genuine. Don't be the girl that laughs at random football jokes that you don't understand just because he is the quarterback of the team. Show him that you are good at bio and that you love dissecting frogs, and don't settle for anything less!
As for asking him out, start it off as a group activity. Maybe you and a couple friends are going to watch that new action flick coming out. Casually mention it to him and leave it open, giving him a chance to back out or think about it before commiting. After a couple of these activities, it will really show if he is the one for you... and if you still like him that way.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
well, like I said above, Christmas is coming so so so so so soon! I can't wait, can you??
STAY OUT OF TROUBLE AND DON;T FORGET TO SMILE! Merry Christmas and have a safe and happy New Year!
love,
rachelrae xx
Friday, December 9, 2011
Questions revisited :)
Hello everyone! December already, hmm?... can't believe how fast time flies.
Well last post I promised some questions to be answered right? let's tackle them now, shall we? ...
Q: JAAG, there is this guy that is constantly hitting on me. the thing is, i like him but i really don't want to return the romance. any thoughts on how to get this guy off my back? - via Email
JAAG: LOL, that happens to us all at one point in time or another, myself included. what I can give you is that you should let things be. Don't be overly harsh just to tell him that he isn't worth your time, but at the same time, monitor your behaviour around him. Yes, YOUR behaviour. are you touchy feely with him a lot or maybe laugh at jokes that really aren't that funny that he says? if you are, you could be potentially leading him on for no apparent reason and no intention of dating him. Just be yourself and be natural, and hopefully things will go a lot more smoothly for you.
Q: any tips on how to be a better flirt? - via Twitter
JAAG: okay there. i think that the question you meant to ask was, "any tips on how to be a better person that more people will appreciate?" being a flirt isn't all that difficult, but what makes it difficult is that you end up with less than you started out with. what i mean is, being a flirt may get you so far, but after that, there is no substance to what you say or your actions. by being a genuine person who is not superficial or fake and definitely NOT a flirt, you will see that more people, guys and girls alike, will accept you for who you are. it also makes it easier for people to fall for the real you and not a second rate, fake version of you.
Q: there is this guy in the drama club that constantly flirts with me, but when i see him outside of drama club, he acts all haughty and arrogant. why is that? - via email
JAAG: well, let me start off by saying that maybe, just maybe, but don't hold this to me... that maybe he likes you. i take it that maybe he doesn't have that many of his manly guy friends in drama club, and when he is around them, he wants to show them who is boss and who is in charge in this so called 'relationship'. if you think that nah, he doesn't like me, then this guy is a big jerk. call him out on it when you see him in drama club. ask him what the deal is. if he acts all innocent but his alter ego comes out when he leaves the drama club walls, then you know that this guy is definitely not worth your time, and you should move onto the tenor in the club who can't get enough of reading Macbeth. good luck!
Q: How do i tell my boyfriend of three months that it's over? - via Twitter
JAAG: that always hurts, especially if he is the one that still believes in the relationship. I can't tell you how to break up with him, but I can offer some guidelines:
1) Be honest and to the point. It's hard enough for you and for him, so don't beat around the bush with it by trying to soften the blow. tell him nicely, but don't drag it on for the whole lunch hour. make it concise and then leave him alone so that he can absorb the information.
2) Privacy is the best policy. Even though you may need one of your girls for moral support, really, it's showing diesrespect to him. Pull him away from the group gently, and tell him what you need to say. and never do it in front of his friends.
3) NEVER DO THIS OVER EMAIL, FACEBOOK, TWITTER, OR TEXT. as hard as it might be, face to face not only brings you more merit and is more honest, it shows the guy that you are no chicken and you aren't backing out of this the easy way. a phone call is okay but not the best or the most respectful.
I hope these points help. good luck to you with this!
Q: I broke up with my boyfriend a month ago. Now everytime I see him, I think back to when we were together. Sometimes when we talk together I feel myself flirting with him! do you think it was wrong of me to break up with him in the first place? should I get back together with him? - via BloggerMail
JAAG: wow, two questions in one! firstly, congratulations to you and your ex for making things not as awkward and being able to carry a conversation with him despite your past. I can't tell you whether or not it was necessarily wrong of you to break up with him, it's all up to you. Maybe you catch yourself flirting with him because you know him and it's a comfortable spot that you relaxed back into. ask yourself why you broke up with him in the first place, and see if what he does, etc, still bothers you.
secondly, talk to him and be honest with him and yourself. tell him how you feel. If you both think that maybe it was a mistake, then maybe there is a chance for a second romance. i must warn you though: if you break up again, third time usually is not a charm in this case. you may be better off moving on after that point.
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AIIGHTS. thanks again for all of your amazingly difficult but interesting questions! next post will definitely have more to be answered.
well, exam week has just ended. i have another exam tomorrow (sob sob sob!) but after that, it will be free fallling for me. as a matter of fact, I should be studying for that three hour test but NO, I'm answering your questions instead :) oh well. we have a music concert tonight! wish me luck, I have a jazz solo!
if i don't write back within the next couple weeks, I would like to personally wish you and yours a very happy holidays, a peaceful and relaxing Christmas and a prosperous New Year!
STAY OUT OF TROUBLE AND DON'T FORGET TO SMILE! Cheers to everyone in the New Year!
love,
rachelrae xx
Well last post I promised some questions to be answered right? let's tackle them now, shall we? ...
Q: JAAG, there is this guy that is constantly hitting on me. the thing is, i like him but i really don't want to return the romance. any thoughts on how to get this guy off my back? - via Email
JAAG: LOL, that happens to us all at one point in time or another, myself included. what I can give you is that you should let things be. Don't be overly harsh just to tell him that he isn't worth your time, but at the same time, monitor your behaviour around him. Yes, YOUR behaviour. are you touchy feely with him a lot or maybe laugh at jokes that really aren't that funny that he says? if you are, you could be potentially leading him on for no apparent reason and no intention of dating him. Just be yourself and be natural, and hopefully things will go a lot more smoothly for you.
Q: any tips on how to be a better flirt? - via Twitter
JAAG: okay there. i think that the question you meant to ask was, "any tips on how to be a better person that more people will appreciate?" being a flirt isn't all that difficult, but what makes it difficult is that you end up with less than you started out with. what i mean is, being a flirt may get you so far, but after that, there is no substance to what you say or your actions. by being a genuine person who is not superficial or fake and definitely NOT a flirt, you will see that more people, guys and girls alike, will accept you for who you are. it also makes it easier for people to fall for the real you and not a second rate, fake version of you.
Q: there is this guy in the drama club that constantly flirts with me, but when i see him outside of drama club, he acts all haughty and arrogant. why is that? - via email
JAAG: well, let me start off by saying that maybe, just maybe, but don't hold this to me... that maybe he likes you. i take it that maybe he doesn't have that many of his manly guy friends in drama club, and when he is around them, he wants to show them who is boss and who is in charge in this so called 'relationship'. if you think that nah, he doesn't like me, then this guy is a big jerk. call him out on it when you see him in drama club. ask him what the deal is. if he acts all innocent but his alter ego comes out when he leaves the drama club walls, then you know that this guy is definitely not worth your time, and you should move onto the tenor in the club who can't get enough of reading Macbeth. good luck!
Q: How do i tell my boyfriend of three months that it's over? - via Twitter
JAAG: that always hurts, especially if he is the one that still believes in the relationship. I can't tell you how to break up with him, but I can offer some guidelines:
1) Be honest and to the point. It's hard enough for you and for him, so don't beat around the bush with it by trying to soften the blow. tell him nicely, but don't drag it on for the whole lunch hour. make it concise and then leave him alone so that he can absorb the information.
2) Privacy is the best policy. Even though you may need one of your girls for moral support, really, it's showing diesrespect to him. Pull him away from the group gently, and tell him what you need to say. and never do it in front of his friends.
3) NEVER DO THIS OVER EMAIL, FACEBOOK, TWITTER, OR TEXT. as hard as it might be, face to face not only brings you more merit and is more honest, it shows the guy that you are no chicken and you aren't backing out of this the easy way. a phone call is okay but not the best or the most respectful.
I hope these points help. good luck to you with this!
Q: I broke up with my boyfriend a month ago. Now everytime I see him, I think back to when we were together. Sometimes when we talk together I feel myself flirting with him! do you think it was wrong of me to break up with him in the first place? should I get back together with him? - via BloggerMail
JAAG: wow, two questions in one! firstly, congratulations to you and your ex for making things not as awkward and being able to carry a conversation with him despite your past. I can't tell you whether or not it was necessarily wrong of you to break up with him, it's all up to you. Maybe you catch yourself flirting with him because you know him and it's a comfortable spot that you relaxed back into. ask yourself why you broke up with him in the first place, and see if what he does, etc, still bothers you.
secondly, talk to him and be honest with him and yourself. tell him how you feel. If you both think that maybe it was a mistake, then maybe there is a chance for a second romance. i must warn you though: if you break up again, third time usually is not a charm in this case. you may be better off moving on after that point.
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AIIGHTS. thanks again for all of your amazingly difficult but interesting questions! next post will definitely have more to be answered.
well, exam week has just ended. i have another exam tomorrow (sob sob sob!) but after that, it will be free fallling for me. as a matter of fact, I should be studying for that three hour test but NO, I'm answering your questions instead :) oh well. we have a music concert tonight! wish me luck, I have a jazz solo!
if i don't write back within the next couple weeks, I would like to personally wish you and yours a very happy holidays, a peaceful and relaxing Christmas and a prosperous New Year!
STAY OUT OF TROUBLE AND DON'T FORGET TO SMILE! Cheers to everyone in the New Year!
love,
rachelrae xx
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